XWL.com Exclusive: Motor City Diaries: Idle pre-flight chatter

It’s truly a beautiful day outside in this unknown location. The sun is shining brightly high in the sky while the chirping of birds and sounds of lively chatter from idly strolling pedestrians provide the soundtrack for this wonderful morning. Suddenly the sound of horns honking cuts into the serene feeling like nails on a chalkboard and the cameras turn around to reveal it’s in front of Dublin Airport. The cameraman walks alongside the front of the building towards two men with hats on and regular everyday street clothes standing off to the side away from the crowd. In front of these two figures now, the cameraman clears his throat loudly getting their attention and when their faces are caught on camera the mystery men are revealed to be none other than the Ersatz Tag Team Champions, The Motor City Machine Guns: Chris Sabin and Alex Shelley. Sabin chuckles and shakes his head while Shelley yawns loudly.

{Alex Shelley}
See Mitch 2, I told you we wouldn’t leave you behind to fend for yourself in this strange foreign land. What had happened was Chris over here thought the flight was at 6 am instead of noon and we didn’t realize until we got here and actually checked the tickets. We could have called you but I figured you needed your beauty rest and Chris didn’t disagree.

{Chris Sabin}
It was an honest mistake, but at least you're well rested for the flight back, right? And come to think of it, things could have been much worse, I mean, you could have overslept again. Alex here could have forgotten to apply his seemingly endless supply of hair care products then wonder why every woman in the building was shooting him down. Or maybe I could have gotten into a verbal disagreement with the flight attendant for them not serving pancakes on the plane, again.

{Alex Shelley}
Hey man, I don’t know where you were in the bar last night but I was doing pretty well with the opposite sex if I do say so myself. Sure some of them only wanted my autograph right there on her bosom and some wanted me to break out in song, there was one who was so drunk she didn’t know her name, another was married and then there was one who had a face that played a big part in preventing me from getting a decent amount of sleep last night, I’d say it was on-par for an average Alex Shelley night on the town. Even though this place produced the likes of Prince Devitt and Sheamus it isn’t quite that bad once you’re actually here.

{Chris Sabin}
While you were enjoying yourself in a bar somewhere, Mitch 2 here wanted to see the sights and you know how Mitch 2 is, can't leave him alone for a minute without him getting into some sort of trouble. You don't know how dangerous this place is, Alex, one minute you're walking down the street, minding your own business, the next, you're fighting off a guy with a knife who tried to steal Mitch 2's camera from him. A few kicks later and he was running for his life. I'm a hero! Then he got some of his buddies and we booked it but that's besides the point. The lesson learned from this is to never walk in the streets past midnight, it's not a good idea.

{Alex Shelley}
You got that right, you see some of the weirdest thing once the clock pasts 12. You might catch a glimpse of hobos making out with their reflections…

{Chris Sabin}
People calling for a taxi on an empty street...

{Alex Shelley}
Drunk idiots trying to start a band with trash cans and glass bottles…

{Chris Sabin}
Isn't that how our band got started, Alex? A drunk guy yelling at a wall behind the bar...

{Alex Shelley}
Luckily I showed up when I did and saved the day or The High Crusade would be a completely different band than we know and love today. Maybe it’s just me but I don’t think people would be clamoring to buy an album with that sorry sap signing lead vocals.

{Chris Sabin}
Give the guy a break, I'm sure he's doing the best he can. At least that guy wouldn't confuse his best friend for AJ Styles, right Alex?

{Alex Shelley}
It’s not my fault both of your last names begin with ‘S’. And have you seen the guy and his crazy hair and beard lately? He’s trying really hard to look like you these days. Hell, I wouldn’t be surprised if he started using the Cradle Shock in one his matches, just because. You know, like how Randy Orton inspired you to incorporate the RKO into your arsenal. So you should feel flattered that there’s a man out there that’s moved enough by your work that’d he’d try to become your long lost twin.

{Chris Sabin}
You know as well as I do, Alex, no one else can pull of being Chris Sabin like Chris Sabin can. Well, there was that one guy in Ohio but he doesn't count. Anyways, are we going to let the people know what we're doing in this fine place or are we going to continue to leave them in suspense?

{Alex Shelley}
Our reason for being here is quite elementary, my friend. We’re just killing time until it’s time for our flight, and what better way to do that but to reflect on the last Breakdown and how, thanks to my dear old pal Kenny King, Corey Graves can now say he beat me in a match. I thought we had seen the last of him after Men of Honor fell apart but I guess this guy has an obsession with failure.

{Chris Sabin}
I guess that's why he surrounds himself with people like Ryback and Amazing Red, to make himself feel better about his failure. Men of Honor was just another group of individuals that we outlasted, just like we'll outlast The West Side Army after they inevitably turn on Graves like his old pals AJ Styles and Dean Ambrose did.

{Alex Shelley}
And until that day when everything falls apart we have plenty going on individually to keep us occupied. I have my United States Championship defense to prepare for, though let’s be serious for a second, how much preparation do you need to face the likes of Kenny King? You wrestled him last week, Chris, what were your thoughts on him.

{Chris Sabin}
If that was his A game, then you don't got anything to worry about, Alex. Although, I wouldn't underestimate him, we learned that lesson the hard way when we both got beat by The Miz. You know, I think that was his greatest accomplishment, managing to beat The Guns on two separate occasions, but in the end, you shut him up when you successfully defended your United States Championship at Supremacy.

{Alex Shelley}
We just can’t seem to get rid of that Miz fella can we? Just when we thought we’d seen the last of him, he pops up in the Elimination Chamber match. It’s all or nothing this time around, pal, can’t afford to let Miz steal another. If there was anyone that I’d want to come out of that chamber and become the new world heavyweight champion… well let’s just say I don’t make a habit of betting against The Guns.

{Chris Sabin}
And that's not playing favoritism, that's just smart betting if you ask me. Who in the right mind would bet against a gun to begin with? Besides Mitch 2 here betting on Colt a couple weeks back. Lost a lot of money there, didn't you pal?

{Alex Shelley}
I’m sure he did. It’s not like he has a family to feed or anything, some man you are Mitch 2. Well, while we’re on the subject of asses, I sent out a tweet when I woke up because I figured we’d have some time to spare.



{Alex Shelley}
Looks like there’s a lot of people awake this early in the morning. How about you read the first question, Chris so that we can get this thing started.

{Chris Sabin}
I'm surprised Mitch 2 didn't sell these questions again like last time, I mean really, who buys questions in the first place? Anyways, onto the question: If your cameraman is named Mitch 2, what happened to the original Mitch? Well, you see, the thing is...