XWL.com Exclusive: Motor City Diaries: Who (forgot to) let the Wolves out?

The video opens with the Motor City Machines in an unknown location staring out into the distance. Their match against The American Wolves is on the horizon and on the grandest stage of them all The Guns can’t afford to get shown up. Not after everything they’ve been through not after all the months they put into bringing a new era into XWL. It seems like only just yesterday Generation-Next was taking on The Kings of Wrestling with the injured Sabin watching helplessly from the sidelines. Since then the two friends have been reunited and there’s no doubt it feels good. They’ve gone through gauntlets and handicap matches, but oddly enough The Wolves may pose one of the biggest challenges to date. They’ve stuck around longer than most, and since debuting they’ve sunk their teeth into The Guns and haven’t let go. Tonight the two teams will square off and give Final Stand one of the greatest tag matches between two of the greatest teams in the business today.



{Alex Shelley}
Welcome to the Motor City Diaries held by none other than the reigning Ersatz Tag Team Champions, The Motor City Machine Guns, Alex Shelley and the man who tried to get a date with Kelly Kelly by calling himself Chris Chris: Chris Sabin. Last week we weren’t around but it’s not because we don’t care about you fans, in fact it was because we care too much and we wanted to make sure that we were 100.5% ready to take on The Wolves at Final Stand. We meditated, played a little x-box, did some DDP yoga and had pancakes for dinner and that was just on day one of our week off.



{Chris Sabin}
The first day is always the hardest, but not in this case. We have put our bodies through hell to get ready for this match against you, American Wolves. This may be just another match to you guys, but to us, this is where we're at a crossroads, this is where our future is determined. For many months, we have fought, and fought hard, to make our Ersatz Tag Team Championships the official championships of this company. We put ourselves against three teams just to show how serious we were, but no one, not one single person in the XWL offices, gave a damn when we won. Then we decided to play Hogan's game and were put in a five on two situation against the New World Order. After we won that match as well, people still didn't care about this tag division. Enter The American Wolves.



{Alex Shelley}
They entered in a fantastic fashion, I mean what better way to make a splash than to attack the two best things that XWL has going for it. Now don’t get us wrong, it wasn’t all fun and games and syndicated television shows for us. We actually went out of our way to attend a local event that XWL was hosting, an event that we knew the Wolves were at where we wanted to challenge them face to face to a match at Final Stand. The Wolves have this impression we’re nothing but a couple of jokesters who don’t take anything seriously and if they head into that match with that mindset then they’re going to get embarrassed. Well that’s if the match even happens, luckily good ol’ Mitch 2.0 was there to record what went down when The Guns called out The Wolves.

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Last week




Everyone gets on their feet when the music of the Motor City Machine Guns blasts through the speakers. The cheers are near deafening as the fan favorites step onto the stage and walk over to opposite sides of the stage and raise the Ersatz Tag Team Championship high into the air. Sabin and Shelley walk back over to the middle of the stage where they do their secret handshake and then their signature gun point at the head of the ramp.



Pyro explodes on both sides imitating the sound of gunshots and the two men smile and nod in each other’s direction before Sabin starts walking down the ramp. He holds his title in front of the camera and shouts:



{Chris Sabin}
It's beautiful, isn't it?

He winks at the camera and slaps a few high fives and starts schmoozing with a woman sitting in the front row. While they chat, the camera cuts back over to Shelley who has yet to move from his spot at the top of the ramp. He looks perplexed for a few seconds and then he says out loud:



{Alex Shelley}
Did I remember to turn off the stove?

Shelley shrugs in response to his own question then jogs down the ramp and pulls Sabin away from the woman just as she gives him her phone number and the camera zooms in on the piece of paper she wrote on as it gently sways from side to side and lands on the ground.




The Machine Guns are inside of the ring and the people continue to cheer. Once the music fades away a “Motor City” chant breaks out followed by a series of claps. The Guns continue to play to the crowd as they climb up on separate turnbuckles and raise their championships high in the air to the delight of their fans. When they climb down the two men are handed microphones and Sabin goes to speak first but Shelley stops him and says he has something on his face.



As Sabin checks, Shelley quickly speaks up taking the opening lines for himself.



{Alex Shelley}
It feels like just yesterday we were in this very ring getting beat up by The Men of Honor only to be saved by The American Wolves because they wanted us all to themselves. Now I’ll admit that knowing that the Wolves can’t get us off their minds is flattering but that doesn’t change the fact that, at this point, Chris and I would love nothing more than to take these titles and bash them over the skulls with it. We’ve had enough of teams like the Wolves resorting to cheap attacks just because they feel threatened when they realize that we are the team in XWL. When will these teams realize messing with us is just as dangerous as playing with a loaded gun? Where are the Kings of Wrestling today, huh? Look what happened to Men of Honor, they’re already one member down. Hell, Eddie is somewhere licking his wounds, because just like the rest he thought we’d be easy prey and he paid a price.



{Alex Shelley}
But not a monetary price, no. I’m sure his health insurance covered his trip to the vet and XWL is always nice enough to cover travel expenses. It’s a physical price that he paid because he was too hurt to stand by his buddy’s side last week. Now Chris has been hurt in the past week more times than I can count, so I know how you feel Davey. I know what it’s like to not have your number one by your side. You feel vulnerable, the car rides aren’t as funny, the chicks are harder to pick up, there’s no one to fight over the slice of pizza with… but most importantly of all… there’s no one to match outfits with.

The camera zooms out to show Shelley in his blue jeans and Sabin in his brown pants and then Sabin raises his microphone and begins to speak.



{Chris Sabin}
There's a very simple explanation as to why we're not matching, Alex. You see, I forgot my blue jeans in my other pants. Davey, I'd say that you're the Alex Shelley of the American Wolves but that would be an insult to Alex because you Wolves are nothing like us, while you're out hunting for food, we like to order a pizza or two. While you're training, we're playing video games. Yet, it's our differences that caused us to collide in the first place. We have something that you think belongs to you, these beautiful XWL Ersatz Tag Team Championships we have over our shoulders.



{Chris Sabin}
That is what makes us the best team in this company, and as long as we have these with us, we're always going to have a target on our backs. Hell, we've been targeted by so many people, we're used to having to look over our shoulder every few seconds. You, just like all of those teams, will be knocked back down the mountain and sent to the back of the line, then the cycle will repeat itself. Just realized you called me injury prone, Alex, we've been over this, I have a note from that doctor that says otherwise.



{Alex Shelley}
Well I have a note from my mom that says, “Good night, sleep tight, don’t let the Wolves bite,” and I’ll be damned if I let her down. The Wolves are trying desperately to scare us with their petty threats and their deep menacing voices but they haven’t said anything that I haven’t already heard in a horror movie. They may seem a little unruly now but that’s because we haven’t broken them in and tamed them yet. It’s only a matter of time before they’re eating out of their own bowls and peeing outside like good pets. I’m a man though, and I’m not ashamed to admit there are certain things that do scare The Motor City Machine Guns, but the American Wolves are not one of those things. As for the things that do send shivers down our spines, there’s Godzilla,

{Chris Sabin}
there's places that don't serve pancakes,

{Alex Shelley}
zombie apocalypse,

{Chris Sabin}
chicks that try to give you their number but don't have a pen,

{Alex Shelley}
Mae Young in a two piece,

{Chris Sabin}
Ryback when he has his sights set on the buffet table,

{Alex Shelley}
Mark Henry after Ryback eats all the food on the buffet table,

{Chris Sabin}
My credit card bill after Alex finds out where I hid my visa,

{Alex Shelley}
snakes on a plane,

{Chris Sabin}
and snakes not on a plane.



{Alex Shelley}
What this all boils down to Wolves is that you don’t intimidate us which is why we’re re-challenging you to a match at Final Stand because we want to do it the right was and that’s face to face.

Shelley and Sabin drop their mics and stare at the stage waiting for The Wolves to come out and accept the proposal face to face. A minute passes the people begin to boo because it doesn’t look like The Wolves are coming out tonight. Sabin lowers himself down to the mat and pretends to take a nap leaving Shelley to watch things over in the off chance that The Wolves do show up. Shelley then checks his invisible watch and taps it impatiently and after another few minutes pass, he taps Sabin to wake him up. Shelley lays down on the mat and gets some shut eye leaving Sabin on lookout duty. Sabin looks around the arena from his spot in the ring and peaks through the ropes to makes sure that The Wolves aren’t hiding ringside. After a minute or two Sabin taps Shelley to wake him up but Shelley just rolls over and it looks like Sabin is pulling a double shift tonight.

Sabin shrugs before exiting the ring and checking under the ring to make sure the Wolves aren’t lurking there. He peaks over the barricade and empties his pockets to make sure The Wolves aren’t hiding in any of those places. Sabin gets back into the ring and tries to get Shelley to wake up but once again Shelley ignores him and with no other options Sabin begins to howl. Shelley springs up to his feet and looks ready for a fight until he realizes it was only Sabin. Shelley shakes his head in disappointment, and exits the ring with Sabin right behind him. As the two men walk up the ramp the crowd breaks out in a “Motor City” chant in support of their favorite duo, and when The Guns get onto the stage they raise their titles proudly into the air with one hand and do their signature gun point with the other. The video feed cuts out after that and we’re taken back to Shelley and Sabin operating from their undisclosed location.

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{Chris Sabin}
As you can tell, the Wolves wanted nothing to do with us, they didn't even have the balls to come out to the ring and accept our challenge. That's fine, we did you one better, we went to the offices of Hulk Hogan and we told him what we had in mind for Final Stand. He really liked our idea and the match was made official. There may have been a bit biased against The American Wolves, then again, they did try to take him out.



{Chris Sabin}
You Wolves talk a big game, you act like you're the big dogs in the yard, but when you get called out, you don't show up. That and that alone proves what we've been saying all along: your bark is much bigger than your bite. We know you have no intention of coming out for the match, we know that you would rather hide in the back than come out and be shown up by the Motor City Machine Guns. So I'll tell you what we'll do, what about we put these beautiful XWL Ersatz Tag Team Championships on the line?



{Alex Shelley}
And all that can be yours at a price of free… on one condition. If you want this match, if you want these titles to go on the line, and if you want to prove that you are the best team in this company without a doubt, then we want you to come out and accept our challenge face to face. But this time around, we want you to make the first move, we’re not going to get stood up like Dolph Ziggler at prom again. The card may read: The Motor City Machine Guns vs. The American Wolves, but it doesn’t have to be you two standing across the ring from us. There are plenty of other teams who we can call up to take your place and I’m sure Hogan wouldn’t mind denying you the chance to compete at the biggest show of the year. This is a limited time offer, Wolves, and the clock is ticking. During Final Stand we want you to come out there and like a dog begs for a treat we want you to beg for a shot at us and at this title. If you want to compare yourself to an animal, then we’re going to treat you like one.

The screen fades to black as the segment ends leaving us to wonder what could possibly go down next. Would The American Wolves actually beg for a match? Would the Motor Machine City Machine Guys actually replace them if they don’t? There are questions that can only be answered by time, and luckily the moment of truth is drawing closer and closer.