XWL Redemption: 7/31/2011 - 8/7/2011

***As the Redemption intro video finishes, pyro starts going off on the titantron, and Devour by Sinedown plays through out the arena***

Michael Cole: We are live in the sold out home of the Quicken Loan Arena in Cleveland, Ohio and what a night we have in store you tonight. As in the main event Ted Dibiase will team up with the XWL World Heavyweight champion The Rock as they take on CM Punk and the number one contender Alberto Del Rio in a tag team match!

Joey Styles: Not only that but we have two King of the Ring qualifying matches as former United States champion Justin Gabriel will take on Kofi Kingston

Michael Cole: And former World champion Chris Jericho will take on Kurt Angle!

Joey Styles: It's going to be a great show tonight, and I can't wait to get started.



***As Kurt Angle's theme hits the arena the cheer stand on their feet and cheer***

Justin Roberts: Please welcome, the only Olympic Gold medallist in XWL history, Kurt Angle!



Michael Cole: This is the man who will take on Chris Jericho in a King of the Ring qualifying match.

Joey Styles: These two are both great in ring competitors, and it should be a great match tonight.

***As Kurt reaches half way down the ramp his raises his arms in the arm pointing to the roof of the arena, and his red, white and blue fireworks explode four times, before lowering his arms and continuing to the ring***

Michael Cole: Last week both men warmed up in great style, as Kurt Angle made the debuting Mr. Anderson tap out to the ankle lock.

Joey Styles: That last last week was filled was back and fourth action, as Anderson was more then fired up for his debut, but Kurt Angle did everything he could and walked out victorious.

Michael Cole: And also Chris Jericho came out last week as a winner, as he defeated Mr. FN.

Joey Styles: Jericho has seemingly been on a war path since losing the World championship, having turned his back on the fans he's now showing a lot more serious and aggressive side of him, and you can't knock the results.

***Now in the ring, Kurt pulls a microphone out of his tracksuit bottoms, as his theme fades out and he starts to address the crowd***



Kurt Angle: You know, tonight in a very special night as Kurt Angle officially enters the King of the Ring against Chris Jericho.

***The crowd begin to boo at Angle's mentioning at Jericho's name.***

Kurt Angle: Now not to take anything anyway from what Chris has achieved in his career, he's a multiple time World champion in this very company. And just look at the guys he's beaten to get there. Edge, Mr. FN, MVP and Sheamus. You can't doubt the amount of hard work he's put into doing so either, because becoming a champion is no easy feat. So needless to say I have a lot of respect for Chris Jericho, but the thing about that is, when you step into this ring with me, I don't care who you are, or what you've done, because as soon as that bell rings you're just the same as everybody else, and my only aim is to make your ass tap out.



Kurt Angle: And the winner will face either Kofi Kingston or Justin Gabriel, so let's just call that extra incentive. And I pray to god that it's Justin Gabriel that gets through, so I can finally get my revenge for him taking me out over two months ago. And when I'm done with him, as far as I see it it's a clear path to the King of the Ring title. It doesn't matter who I face CM Punk or Drew McIntyre because everyone knows that I'll come out victorious and go on to Supremacy, and face whatever loser Breakdown has to offer. After all there's a reason we're the A show. Evan Bourne, Sheamus, Christian, Daniels, Cody Rhodes or John Morrison it doesn't matter who. Because when you go one on one with your Olympic Hero there's only going to be one outcome. Oh it's true.

***The crowd begin to chant "Angle, Angle, Angle"***



Kurt Angle: And just incase anybody doubts me becoming the winner of the King of the Ring, not that it will happen, but I will quit on the spot.

***Kurt drops his microphone in the middle of the ring as his theme begins to play again, with the crowd in shock***



Joey Styles: What an announcement by Kurt Angle. But you have to wonder what he's thinking.

Michael Cole: This could be a huge mistake by Angle here, as he definitely hasn't got an easy route to the finals, and there's not many harder starts then against Chris Jericho tonight.

***Kurt rolls out of the ring, and begins to walk back of the ramp***

Joey Styles: You can say that again, Cole, we could be seeing Kurt Angle's last match here tonight!

Michael Cole: Kurt never does things the easy way, but he might not bitten off more then he can chew tonight.

Joey Styles: Well I can't wait to find out later tonight, but now we have to head to a commercial break.

***As Joey Styles announces the commercial break, the camera fades out***

*We return from commercial to Josh Matthew's announcing who he is about to interview.*

{Josh Matthews}
Welcome back to Redemption ladies and gentlemen. I'm standing here with...

*Josh Matthew's rolls his eyes as he reads off a piece of paper*

{Josh Matthews}
"Captain Chicks and America, The Cadillac of a Man, Mr. .." What's that say?

*The camera pans out and we see Derrick Bateman*

{Bateman}
Are you serious Josh! It says Mr. Man-Tastic! We went over this during the whole commercial break!



{Josh Matthews}
Well I'm sorry that I'm not able to pronounce made up words!

{Bateman}
It's not made up!!

{Josh Matthews}
Well is it in the dictionary?

{Bateman}
No... But it should be in the dictionary, next to a picture of yours truy with the synonym "Future United States Champion and King of Cool!!"



{Josh Matthews}
Alright. Well Derrick Bateman you made quite a debut last week defeating several local competitors in your own King of the Ring, but tonight you are going to go one on one with Roderick Strong! And he's defiantly going to be a much tougher competitor then the wrestlers you beat last week. Any thoughts on your match?

{Bateman}
Well Josh, I have a lot of respect for Roderick's work ethic and attitude. I've crossed paths with him backstage earlier tonight and we got along pretty well... After all who couldn't get along with the most charismatic superstar in the XWL!



{Josh Matthews}
You think that Roderick is the most charismatic superst-

{Bateman}
No Josh I meant me of course!! Captain Chicks and America, The Cadillac of a Man, Mr. Man-Tastic!!! Derrick Bateman!!... See, now was that really that hard Josh!

{Josh Matthews}
Well it's not my fault that I can't read your hand writing!

{Bateman}
It's just one sentence!! And we went over it five times before we went live!! And yet you still messed it up!!!

{Josh Matthews}
Let's not get off topic now.. Are you at all worried about what Dolph Ziggler is thinking about your verbal assault on him last week?

{Bateman}
Not at all Josh. Dolph is probably sitting in his locker room now wishing that he was more like me. That he was able to get the crowd to cheer for him like they do for me.. he's jealous of my potential.



{Josh Matthews}
Okay, back to Roderick.

{Bateman}
He's a great competitor but he just doesn't have what I do. I'm the most charismatic Superstar in the XWL, and the master of Technician and Submission. Back in XWL's Developmental Territory I was given tips by none other than Daniel Bryan. I may not be a Submission Specialist like Breakdown's DB, but Redemption's DB will show the XWL that Submission Wrestling is.... cool.



{Josh Matthews}
Speaking of cool, where's the other "King of Cool" Carlito?

{Bateman}
Well Josh that's a funny story... You see back in the XWL Developmental Territory Carlito had some problems with.. anger.. He kept spitting in people's faces and causing fights and mayhem. So since we are now the most Dynamic Duo in the XWL, and the Kings of Cool. We both thought that it would be for the best if he went to a... anger management seminar.



{Josh Matthews}
Anger Management?

*A door opens next to Bateman and a few unrecognizable people walk out followed by none other than Carlito. Carlito stops upon seeing Bateman and gives him a high five*

{Bateman}
How you feeling bro? That Anger Management Seminar help?

*Carlito nods yes*

{Bateman}
You think you're ready to watch my match with Roderick without letting your anger get the best of you and cause you to interfere or spit in his face. Because Derrick Bateman and Carlito are all about...



{Carlito}
Being Cool...

{Bateman}
And..?



{Carlito}
The Fans!!!

{Bateman}
And..?



*Carlito scratches his head as if trying to think*

{Bateman}
Chicks and America bro! Let's do this!!!



*Bateman and Carlito chest bump and run out of the camera's view shouting at the top of their lungs*

{Josh Matthews}
Well ladies and gentleman there you have it. Derrick Bateman will be taking on Roderick Strong, coming up next.....

*Josh puts down the microphone and yells to Bateman and Carlito*

{Josh Matthews}
Hey guys the ring is that way.

*Josh is pointing the opposite direction of where Bateman and Carlito ran off. Moments later we see Carlito and Bateman charge past the camera the right way this time as we cut to the commentators table.*

{Styles}
Wow... Those two are hilarious! I can't wait to see how they develop in the XWL!

{Cole}
Seriously? I hope that they get fired as soon as possible, they are the two goofiest people I've seen and are defiantly not worthy of being on Redemption. They should quit before they are fired and join the circus.

{Styles}
Well Carlito won his match against Alex Riley last week. He is able to back up his words with action that's for sure.

{Cole}
Alex who? Until Carlito is able to defeat someone that matters I won't be impressed.

{Styles}
Well does Roderick Strong count as someone that matters to you Cole?

{Cole}
Well he's a lot better than Riley that's for sure!!

{Styles}
Let's see if Bateman can back up his Shenanigans in the ring!



{Ring Announcer}
This contest is set for one fall...Now making his way to the ring, from Tampa Florida, weighing in at 212 lbs... Roderick... Strong!!

*Roderick Strong enters and the crowd cheers as he makes his way down to the ring. He climbs up the steps and into the ring waiting for his opponent.*





{Ring Announcer}
Now entering, the challenger, from Clevland Ohio, weighing in at 205 lbs. accompanied by Carlito... Derrick.... Bateman!!!!



*The crowd begins to cheer and laugh loudly as Bateman enters with Carlito at his side to his hilarious theme song. They run down to ramp giving high fives to the fans on their way before sliding into the ring and climbing the turnbuckle bringing about even more cheers. Bateman stays in the ring as Carlito exits and stands outside. Roderick and Bateman shake hands as the ref rings the bell.*


NORMAL MATCH



*The two circle each other before locking up. Roderick is able to gain control and puts Bateman in a headlock. He quickly turns Bateman around and attempts to Suplex him but Bateman is able to land on his feet. Bateman grabs Roderick and attempts to throw him over the ropes but Roderick is able to counter and sends Bateman into the ropes. Bateman rebounds off the ropes as Roderick leaps over him. Roderick falls to the floor as Bateman rebounds off the ropes again hopping over Roderick. Strong quickly gets to his feet and hits Bateman with a Power-Breaker! Roderick goes for the pin..1..Kick Out!
Strong pulls Bateman to his feet and drags him to the corner. Bateman kicks Roderick in the gut trying to gain control but is quickly stopped by two hard backhand chops. Roderick sits Bateman on the top rope and hits him with another backhand chop before climbing the turnbuckle and putting Bateman in position for a Fireman's Carry from the top rope. Bateman elbows Roderick in the neck area multiple times causing Roderick to place Bateman back on the top rope. Bateman elbows Roderick twice more in the collar bone before pushing him from the top rope to the floor. Bateman stands up and waits for Roderick to get to his feet before hitting a Missile Dropkick!! Bateman goes for the pin..1... Kick Out!!
Bateman quickly goes for the cover again..1..2...Kick Out!!
Bateman quickly trys to bring Roderick to his feet but Strong is able to elbow Bateman in the gut then gets to his feet and follows the elbow with a few well placed kicks. Roderick hits a Canadian Backbreaker and begins to climb the turnbuckle. He hits a Diving Leg Drop and goes for the cover...1..2..Kick Out!!!
Roderick kicks Bateman in the knee before he is able to get back up. He picks up Bateman's knee and slams it back on the ground. He picks Bateman up and performs a Slingshot Suplex Powerslam. He goes for the pin..1....2....Bateman reverses the pin....1...2.. Roderick is able to reverse it...1...2.. Bateman reverses it into a Label Lock!!!.....Roderick struggles to break free.... He starts reaching for the ropes... Roderick elbows Bateman twice and breaks free of the hold and quickly Dropkicks Bateman and puts him in the Stong Hold!!! Bateman struggles to break free... but is able to reach the ropes and Roderick releases the hold. The two look at each other for a moment before locking up. Neither budge an inch and they release the lock. Bateman quickly kicks Roderick to the back of the knee and Roderick kicks back. The two exchange lethal kicks before Roderick is able to daze Bateman with a strong kick to the back of the head. Roderick runs the ropes and hits Bateman with a Powerful Side Kick Big Boot. Roderick goes for the pin...1...2...Kick Out!!!!
Roderick picks up Bateman and gets him in the position for the Death by Roderick but Bateman elbows his way free and gets Roderick in a headlock ready for his finisher Man-Tastic. Roderick powers his way out of the hold and both men begin to run the ropes. Bateman dodges a clothesline from Strong and they rebound off the ropes again. Roderick leaps over Bateman and they continue running the ropes. Finally both men go for a Running Big Boot and both connect!!! Both men are on the floor as we go to commercial.*



{Cole}
Welcome back ladies and gentleman, we are in the middle of a great match here with Derrick Bateman and Roderick Strong!

{Styles}
Great match? I thought you said that these two were jokes!

{Cole}
Well they are both proving me wrong tonight!!

*In the ring Roderick has Bateman in a Inverted Cloverleaf Submission hold. Bateman struggles to break free but is able to reach the ropes once again. Roderick picks Bateman up and hits a Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker!! He goes for the pin..1..2....Kick Out!!!
Roderick grabs Bateman and lifts him to his feet but is met with a kick to the gut followed by a Running Corkscrew Neckbreaker!! Bateman crawls to where Roderick is laying and goes for the pin..1...2..Kick Out!!!
Both men slowly get to their feet but Roderick is able to get the upper hand and puts Bateman in a arm-lock. Bateman is able to counter it and Irish Whips Roderick out of the ring. Roderick flys over the top rope and lands on Carlito who is still standing outside the ring!!!!! Bateman shakes off the cobwebs, lifts his hand in the air bringing some cheers and runs the ropes sending himself diving out of the ring through the middle ropes. He connects with Roderick who was just getting to his feet and both men lay on the outside of the ring floor as the ref counts...1.....2.......3.... Carlito gets to his feet clearly angered by getting hit by Roderick...4.... Roderick slowly begins to get to his feet as Bateman still is laying on the floor....5......Roderick realizes that the ref is already on 5 and attempts to get into the ring but is stopped by Carlito. Carlito yells something that the camera can't pick up and spits in Roderick's face and knocks him back down!!...6.......7.......8..... Bateman slowly gets up and slides into the ring unaware of what Carlito did.....9.......10!!! The ref signals for the bell to ring and holds up Derrick Bateman's hand.
















{Ring Announcer}
Here is your winner as a result of a count out...Derrick Bateman!



*Carlito slides into the ring and celebrates with Bateman as Roderick slowly gets to his feet outside the ring. The ref holds up Bateman's hand as Roderick slides into the ring looking rather angry about what happened. He walks right up to Carlito and pushes him yelling something that the camera can't pick up. Bateman quickly gets in between the two looking confused. Roderick angrily points at the tron where we see a replay of Carlito spitting in Roderick's face, costing him the match. The camera cuts back to the ring where Bateman looks at Carlito like a owner would look at a dog that just peed on the floor.*



*Roderick angrily pushes Carlito again but before chaos breaks loose a familiar theme hits...*



{Styles}
Look Cole, it's Dolph Ziggler!! Why is he here!



*Dolph Ziggler enters to the crowd's boos with a chair in hand. He quickly makes his way to the ring, sliding in with the chair.*

{Cole}
Looks like Ziggler didn't appreciate Bateman running his mouth!!

*Ziggler stands in front of Bateman exchanging words as Roderick and Carlito look on. Suddenly Ziggler cocks back the chair and surprises everyone by hitting Roderick Strong in the head with it. Carlito quickly gets out of the ring dragging Bateman with him. Bateman and Carlito look on as Ziggler stands over Roderick. Bateman trys to get back in the ring but Carlito doesn't let him knowing that Bateman wouldn't be able to help Roderick at the hands of a armed Ziggler. We go to commercial as Ziggler stands over Roderick Strong cockily smiling as his theme plays.*

*The camera fades to black as the words “The following commercial has been paid for by the friends and family of The Miz, and Michael Cole.” The camera shows a 7-Eleven store during the day, two kids are talking whilst looking at the XWL summer exclusive Slurpee Cups.*

Kid #1- I don't know which one to choose, I want the cup with either The Rock or Randy Orton!

Kid #2- No way! I want the Alex Shelley one!

Kid #1- Where's the Chris Jericho one?

Kid #2- There's a box full of them over there, I guess nobody wanted them. Just like The Miz' one!

*The camera shows the outside of the 7-Eleven again as The Miz is shown walking up to the store in his ring attire. He barges into the store and looks at the Slurpee Cups.*



The Miz- Wait, why are all these other chumps on the cups? Who would want to buy one with the likes of The Rock and Ted DiBiase! This is an outrage!



*The Miz stares at the cups with a scowel and knocks all of them off the shelf, apart from his ones of course. He puts six Miz Slurpee Cups all in a row and nods his head.*

Kid #1- What are you doing?! I wanted to get one with Christian on it!

The Miz- Really? REALLY? CHRISTIAN?! Who likes Christian? NOBODY!

*Miz then grabs the kid by his collar, grabs a Slurpee Cup with a picture of Christian on it and pours the drink over the kids head. The other kid just watches with a shocked face then runs away. The camera then shows the outside of the store as Michael Cole is seen sitting in a car, The Miz runs out of the store with a box that reads “Miz Slurpee Cups.” He throws in the box then gets in the car and shouts “Go!” The car drives off.*

XWL 7-Eleven Slurpee Cups, now available!

Redemption cuts to the backstage arena where Kevin Kelly is standing by to get a word with a very hyped up Rock



Kevin Kelly: Hey Rock, I was just wondering if I could get your thoughts on a couple of matters, the first thing I wanted to know was, what are your feelings about being placed in a tag team match tonight with Ted Dibiase against the man who interrupted you at Digital Decision, CM Punk and the man who will challenge for your World Heavyweight Championship at Supremacy, Alberto Del Rio?

The Rock: What are The Rocks feelings? You wanna know how The Great One feels? Well let The Rock say this... FINALLY! THE ROCK! HAS COME BACK! TO CLEVELAND! And The Rock feels exactly the same way he feels before each and every main event he has ever been in! He feels pumped, he feels psyched, he feels ready to whoop those two unlikely lovers asses all over C TOWN!!!



Kevin Kelly: Well, Rock, that's all well and good but haven't you got a game plan? Aren't you taking these men a little lightly? I mean one is a former three time World Champion in his own right and the other has been a massive thorn in your side since you arrived here in XWL, I mean, Shouldn't you at least be a little worried? Be a little sca....

The Rock throws his title to the ground and throws his hand up in the face of Kevin Kelly to stop him from finishing....




The Rock: Who in the name of Peter Pans grandma do you think you are?! Do you even listen to yourself when you speak! You stand out here, outside of The Rocks locker room, in front of this sold out Redemption crowd and you ask, you ask The Rock if he is worrried?! What the hell has he got to be worried about? Not only does he have a fellow third generation superstar on his side, that is completely irrelevant because The Rock wouldn't even have to tag Ted Dibiase in, oh no no no, The Rock could go out there tonight and take Del Rios shiny new car, WAMN DRIVE IT RIGHT UP HIS ASS! Ted Dibiase could go out the tonight, BAMN shove a can of pepsi straight up CM Punks ass! Hell, even you Kevin Kelly, with your cheap toupee and your low sex drive, even you could go out there tonight and take care of CM Punk and Del Rio!



The Rock: What's the matter? Don't you believe The Rock? You don't have any faith in The Peoples Champion? You trust him when he tells you that even you Kevin Kelly could beat Punk and Alberto, you just gotta know how!

Kevin Kelly looks at The Rock dazed for a second unsure of what to say

The Rock: And if you will stop staring at The Peoples Pecs for just one second, then The Rock will tell you how to beat them, would you like to know how?

Kevin looks down at the floor, almost rejecting The Rocks offer

The Rock: Well Kevin Kelly, it's not up to you. Would you people here tonight like The Rock to teach this sad little man who probably still lives in his mothers basement playing video games all day with one hand on the keyboard and the other hand scratching his fat ass, would you people like The Rock to show him how to beat The Straight Edge Spice Girl and The Mexican Strudel Jockey?

The Crowd all cheer at once giving The Rock his very definitive answer



The Rock: Ok first we will start with CM Punk, beating him can be accomplished two ways, the first way is a little trick, a little trick that The Rock has figured out, you see you tell this man he can't do something, you dare him to do anything and his ego is so damn big, that sooner or later? You can bet your level eighty seven warrior that he will do it! So you go out there and you bet CM Punk that he can't lie down while you pin him and there you go, you have your win.

Kevin Kelly looks at The Rock with a very skeptical expression on his face, clearly doubting his tactic would work.



The Rock: So you don't like the first way? No? That's fine because like The Rock said, there are two ways to beat CM Punk, failing the first option then all you have to do is grab a bible. Turn it to page five hundred and thirty seven, ah yes, the new Rock testiment, Rock 4:16.....Know your damn role! And shut your damn mouth! Turn that bible sideways and shove it so far up CM Punks vagina that the next time it bleeds he won't know if it's a papercut or his period!

Kevin Kelly: But Rock? That doesn't make any se...

The Rock: Shut your mouth jabroni, The Rock was not finished! Now onto Alberto Del Rio, a man that The Rock has faced more times than you've had dinner which means The Rock knows how to beat him, what ticks him off, how he takes care of business! So you listen to The Rock, there is one thing that you have to do to lure him into a false sense of security, bend over...

Without pausing to think it over, Kevin Kelly does exactly that



The Rock looks on stunned at Kevin who is bent over in front of him for some reason, it's 4:50am, gimme a break.



The Rock: SWEET JESUS! WHAT IN THE NAME OF GOD ARE YOU DOING YOU SIIIIIIICK FREAAAAK! GET UP! GET UP BEFORE THE ROCK WHOOPS YOUR CANDY ASS SO HARD YOU WONT BE ABLE TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BLUE AND SOUTH! IN FACT, GET THE HELL OUT OF THE ROCKS PICTURE!



The Rock shoves Kevin Kelly away to the side roughly and he can be heard crashing through some equipment in the background



The Rock: Now CM Punk, Alberto Del Rio, fun and games, laughing and joking aside, if you two girls have the testicular fortitude to make your way down the peoples ramp tonight then just know this, you are going to get the absolute best of The Great One! The absolute best of The World Heavyweight Champion! So The Rock has three words for you both!



The Rock: JUST BRING IT! Oh and Del Rio, if you don't understand that then maybe you'll understand this!



The Rock: Sólo traer puta!

IFFFFFFFFF YAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!


WHAT THE ROCK!


IS!





COOKIN'

Redemption cuts to the backstage arena where Kevin Kelly is standing by to get a word with a very hyped up Rock



Kevin Kelly: Hey Rock, I was just wondering if I could get your thoughts on a couple of matters, the first thing I wanted to know was, what are your feelings about being placed in a tag team match tonight with Ted Dibiase against the man who interrupted you at Digital Decision, CM Punk and the man who will challenge for your World Heavyweight Championship at Supremacy, Alberto Del Rio?

The Rock: What are The Rocks feelings? You wanna know how The Great One feels? Well let The Rock say this... FINALLY! THE ROCK! HAS COME BACK! TO CLEVELAND! And The Rock feels exactly the same way he feels before each and every main event he has ever been in! He feels pumped, he feels psyched, he feels ready to whoop those two unlikely lovers asses all over C TOWN!!!



Kevin Kelly: Well, Rock, that's all well and good but haven't you got a game plan? Aren't you taking these men a little lightly? I mean one is a former three time World Champion in his own right and the other has been a massive thorn in your side since you arrived here in XWL, I mean, Shouldn't you at least be a little worried? Be a little sca....

The Rock throws his title to the ground and throws his hand up in the face of Kevin Kelly to stop him from finishing....




The Rock: Who in the name of Peter Pans grandma do you think you are?! Do you even listen to yourself when you speak! You stand out here, outside of The Rocks locker room, in front of this sold out Redemption crowd and you ask, you ask The Rock if he is worrried?! What the hell has he got to be worried about? Not only does he have a fellow third generation superstar on his side, that is completely irrelevant because The Rock wouldn't even have to tag Ted Dibiase in, oh no no no, The Rock could go out there tonight and take Del Rios shiny new car, WAMN DRIVE IT RIGHT UP HIS ASS! Ted Dibiase could go out the tonight, BAMN shove a can of pepsi straight up CM Punks ass! Hell, even you Kevin Kelly, with your cheap toupee and your low sex drive, even you could go out there tonight and take care of CM Punk and Del Rio!



The Rock: What's the matter? Don't you believe The Rock? You don't have any faith in The Peoples Champion? You trust him when he tells you that even you Kevin Kelly could beat Punk and Alberto, you just gotta know how!

Kevin Kelly looks at The Rock dazed for a second unsure of what to say

The Rock: And if you will stop staring at The Peoples Pecs for just one second, then The Rock will tell you how to beat them, would you like to know how?

Kevin looks down at the floor, almost rejecting The Rocks offer

The Rock: Well Kevin Kelly, it's not up to you. Would you people here tonight like The Rock to teach this sad little man who probably still lives in his mothers basement playing video games all day with one hand on the keyboard and the other hand scratching his fat ass, would you people like The Rock to show him how to beat The Straight Edge Spice Girl and The Mexican Strudel Jockey?

The Crowd all cheer at once giving The Rock his very definitive answer



The Rock: Ok first we will start with CM Punk, beating him can be accomplished two ways, the first way is a little trick, a little trick that The Rock has figured out, you see you tell this man he can't do something, you dare him to do anything and his ego is so damn big, that sooner or later? You can bet your level eighty seven warrior that he will do it! So you go out there and you bet CM Punk that he can't lie down while you pin him and there you go, you have your win.

Kevin Kelly looks at The Rock with a very skeptical expression on his face, clearly doubting his tactic would work.



The Rock: So you don't like the first way? No? That's fine because like The Rock said, there are two ways to beat CM Punk, failing the first option then all you have to do is grab a bible. Turn it to page five hundred and thirty seven, ah yes, the new Rock testiment, Rock 4:16.....Know your damn role! And shut your damn mouth! Turn that bible sideways and shove it so far up CM Punks vagina that the next time it bleeds he won't know if it's a papercut or his period!

Kevin Kelly: But Rock? That doesn't make any se...

The Rock: Shut your mouth jabroni, The Rock was not finished! Now onto Alberto Del Rio, a man that The Rock has faced more times than you've had dinner which means The Rock knows how to beat him, what ticks him off, how he takes care of business! So you listen to The Rock, there is one thing that you have to do to lure him into a false sense of security, bend over...

Without pausing to think it over, Kevin Kelly does exactly that



The Rock looks on stunned at Kevin who is bent over in front of him for some reason, it's 4:50am, gimme a break.



The Rock: SWEET JESUS! WHAT IN THE NAME OF GOD ARE YOU DOING YOU SIIIIIIICK FREAAAAK! GET UP! GET UP BEFORE THE ROCK WHOOPS YOUR CANDY ASS SO HARD YOU WONT BE ABLE TO TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN BLUE AND SOUTH! IN FACT, GET THE HELL OUT OF THE ROCKS PICTURE!



The Rock shoves Kevin Kelly away to the side roughly and he can be heard crashing through some equipment in the background



The Rock: Now CM Punk, Alberto Del Rio, fun and games, laughing and joking aside, if you two girls have the testicular fortitude to make your way down the peoples ramp tonight then just know this, you are going to get the absolute best of The Great One! The absolute best of The World Heavyweight Champion! So The Rock has three words for you both!



The Rock: JUST BRING IT! Oh and Del Rio, if you don't understand that then maybe you'll understand this!



The Rock: Sólo traer puta!

IFFFFFFFFF YAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SMELLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!


WHAT THE ROCK!


IS!





COOKIN'

*As the ref calls for the bell he walks over to raise the hand of Zack Ryder. As Zack’s hand is being raised he pulls it away from the ref and goes up to the top turnbuckle to celebrate his win over Jackson. After about forty seconds of gloating Zack signals to the time keeper to bring him a microphone and his music is cut as he begins to address the crowd*

Zack Ryder: *Pants* Ladies and gentlemen your winner … LONG ISLAND ICED Z *Zack throws up the Long Island hand sign* Zack Ryder.

*Zack stops for a second to catch his breath after the hellacious match he just had with Ezekiel Jackson*

Zack Ryder:Now as some of you may know I run a little internet show over there on YouTube called “Z True Long Island Story” and if you don’t know about it then you should head over to www.Youtube.com/Longislandicedz and check it out me and my buds having fun making YouTube videos to entertain you guys in the audience and of course everyone watching around the world, or at least those of you that didn’t leave the TV to go to the bathroom or get something to eat. Now enough about me … wait no it’s still about me.

*Zack seems to laugh at this own “Joke”, of course none of the crowd found it funny as they sit in silence as this random nobody continues to waste their time with his useless talking*

Zack Ryder: Now see a few weeks ago I made my return to XWL in a tag team match, I teamed with the Ja .. I mean African sensation Kofi Kingston to take on the big bad Brothers of Destruction. And of course … I lost cause see I’m what the guys in the back like to call well … a “Loser”. Are you serious bro? I’m not a loser, I’m far from a loser, I mean just cause I get beat up in this ring a lot doesn’t mean I’m a loser, like take tonight for example I beat a guy twice my size and I didn’t even break a sweat.

*A few members of the crowd cheer at the obvious lie, which they know is Zack’s attempt to try to get them to laugh and it seems to be working, if only just a little bit*

Zack Ryder: Now back to the subject on hand, over the past couple of weeks, well actually the past couple of months. I have been asking the big wigs in the back when I would get a shot at some XWL gold. And each time I get the same answer “Zack you’re not over enough with the crowd and you don’t win enough matches to deserve a shot, you should be happy you even have a job” Are you serious bro? I’m not over? Me Zack Ryder? The internet sensation? Well I came to the conclusion that if they wouldn’t give me a shot at a title, then I would just make my own belt.

*Zack goes to the ropes and calls for the time keeper to bring him the briefcase he gave him before the show*

Zack Ryder: Ladies and gentlemen I present to you my new championship belt.

*Zack opens the briefcase and takes out a title with a face plate in the shape of his head with the word internet over the head band and champion under the face, the side plates have engravings of popular internet sites like YouTube, Twitter, and FaceBook, as well as Zack’s own personal logo. Zack puts the title over his shoulder before continuing*

Zack Ryder: Ladies and gentlemen I present to you … the Internet Championship, isn’t it beautiful, I had it customized just for me I mean look at it bro it has my face on it.


*A few fans cheer for Ryder and are impressed by his new belt, but most of the crowd remains silent*

Zack Ryder: Well that’s all the time I have so remember to subscribe to my YouTube channel.


* A picture of Zack’s YouTube channel with a link over it appears on the TitanTron *

Zack Ryder: Follow me on twitter.


*A picture of Zack’s Twitter with a link over it appears on the TitanTron *

Zack Ryder: Like me on FaceBook.


* A picture of Zack’s FaceBook with a link over it appears on the TitanTron *

Zack Ryder: And take care.

*Zack brushes his hair and then pats the top of it*

Zack Ryder: Spike your hair … WOO WOO WOO … YOU KNOW IT … BRO.

*With that Zack’s music plays over the speaker system as Zack leaves the ring and heads up the ramp, his new belt over his shoulder and a very small crowd reaction behind him.

Following the match the winner's theme song is played throughtout hte arena much to the adulation of the crowd.



Michael Cole: Well gee, that was exciting.

Joey Styles: Stop being so negative, that match was awesome!

Michael Cole: Yea right, give me a break.

Trish Stratus helps Gail Kim up and the two shake hands. Gail leaves the ring and Trish grabs a microphone.

Trish Stratus || XWL Divas Champion: That woman right there, Gail Kim is one of the best divas to ever step foot in this ring and it was an honor to compete with her tonight. That match that we just is one of the reasons as to why I love this business. I respect Gail Kim and anytime she wants to throw down in this ring, you can always count me in. Thank you Gail, that was amazing.

Joey Styles: That right there is the kind of sportsmanship that makes Trish Stratus one of the best of all time.

Michael Cole: No that right there proved why no body cares about the divas. This is wrestling not doctor Phil, keep the emotions to yourself.

Trish Stratus || XWL Divas Champion: I just beat Gail Kim who is a former xWL Divas Champion and one of the best to ever compete in this ring. Last week, I succesfully defended my title against arguably the most successful diva in XWL, former 5 time XWL Divas Champion, Michelle McCool. I have officially defeated the best that Redemption has to offer, so now I turn my attention to BreakDown. I'm here to prove that I am the best in this business and there's only one way I know how to do that. At Supremacy I am going to defend my title against the best that BreakDown has to offer.

The crowd begins to applaud Trish for her statements.

Trish Stratus || XWL Divas Champion: Speaking of the best that BreakDown has to offer, I have been paying attention to what’s been going on around there. Next week there will be a number one contender’s match to determine who I’ll defend my championship against at Supremacy. Now obviously I am more than interested and from the looks of it, it should be a great match. As a matter of fact, I just may show up next week on BreakDown to see how it live and in person for myself. I’m sure it’ll be amazing and it doesn’t hurt to scout the competition.

Trish smiles as the crowd begins a Trish chant.

Trish Stratus || XWL Divas Champion: you guys are the best but let’s talk about my potential challengers. On one hand we have, XWL rookie AJ Lee, and on the other we have XWL meanie Madison Rayne. AJ is an up and coming diva and is very impressive and I see a bit of myself in her, young and hungry for an opportunity. Then there’s the queen “B “ Madison, who couldn’t help but claim that when I beat her a few weeks ago, that it was because I cheated her, well Madison, earn another shot at me and I’ll show you that I don’t need to cheat to beat anyone. Madison, AJ, next week is the biggest match to date in your careers, give it all you got, because at Supremacy, it’s going to take one heck of an effort to take this title away from me, and to all my fans… I guarantee full Stratusfaction at Supremacy!



Trish bows and lowers the mic as her music hits. She then hoists her title high in the sky as Redemption cuts to a commercial.

Jack Swagger vs Sin Cara







***As soon as Sin Cara enters the ring, Swagger hits him with a big boot and begins an assault on Cara. After about a minute later, the ref manages to get Swagger off of Sin Cara. He makes it back to his feet and the ref calls for the bell to start the match***

As the match starts, Sin Cara tries to get some offense in only to be overpowered by Swagger, who is determined to hurt him. After a few minutes of domination, Swagger begins to get over-confident. He stops in the middle of his assault to have a chat with Cole and Styles. After his chat, picks up a mic and takes his time getting into the ring, even teasing a loss by countout. As he re-enters the ring, he sees Sin Cara struggling to get back to his feet.

***As Swagger begins to speak, he starts stomping Sin Cara after every few words.***

Swagger: This is your hero... this is the guy you people look up to. He can barely stand yet you cheer him. Why? Because he jumps off the ropes, because he entertains you. It's all clear to me now...I know the reason why you people like him...It's because he's weak, like all of you.

***The crowd starts booing Swagger and chanting "Sin Cara"***

Swagger pick up Sin Cara and begins to setup the gutwrench powerbomb, but before he hits it, he starts to flick off the crowd, who boo him even more. He goes for the pin only to lift Caras shoulders off the mat before the 3 count.

Styles: What is he doing? He had the match won.

Cole: He probably want to hurt him more before he wins the match.

Swagger, with a smirk on his face, grabs a hurt Sin Cara and locks in the ankle lock. Cara taps almost instantly. The ref tells Swagger to release the hold, to no avail. After 15 seconds, Swagger releases the hold and gets his hand raised. As he's about to leave the ring, the crowd boos him. Swagger yells at the audience "You can boo me all you want, I'm still going to break his ankle." He locks in the ankle lock once again, only this time he leaves it locked in until more referees and medics come to to ring to get Swagger off Cara. As Swagger leaves to ring all that is heard is Cara screaming in pain as Swagger is on the stage with a smile on is face, and seems pleased with what he has done as Cara is put on a strecher and taken to the nearest medical facility.

***Redemption goes to a commercial break.***