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| | Reviews Thread | |
| | Author | Message |
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Danny Boy Jobber
Posts : 80 Likes : 0 Join date : 2014-06-28 Location : United States
| Subject: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 12:55 am | |
| So since I'm no longer Angle or Miz, but I've still got the time to be both I'm going to transition from an active competitor to just the site's reviewer for the next couple months. Until either XWL gets a PS4 side or there becomes a PS4 league to go to, I'll be doing this and just reviewing shows. I figure my input is worth at least something and maybe it'll help some people to get better. Anyways, I may add some things to this in the future if I can manage it and maybe if Krzy was serious about a Newsletter reboot I could pitch in some work to that or whatever.
Rubric
* You're likely new here and have many flaws, but if you put in some work you'll be able to get right up there with the rest of them.
** You've got a good base to work with here, but a couple things could still be ironed out.
*** Your typical solid promo.
**** We're approaching pretty good grounds here.
***** This will be reserved for amazing segments so don't feel bad if you don't reach this as I don't like to give out five stars.
International Incident: Part One
[Raven] ** I think you're pretty good at the dialogue itself as Raven, but I'd like to see a couple other things. It could be a bit longer, but it's not terribly short. I do like how you use caps quite a bit which is very nice to see, but there's a lack of actions which doesn't let me fully feel what's going on so it'd be nice to include some of those. Anyways, I think you've got something pretty solid to build upon if you just take a couple suggestions.
[Nakamura Shinsuke] **** I really liked a lot about this promo and the way it set the tone for later on tonight as Nakamura being the hometown hero that he is. It was nice to be able to see many different events Nakamura has gone to throughout the week and I really like the creativity in it because seeing things that branch away from the norm is always great. The whole storyline of Nakamura has been great because Oreo isn't one to typically get WHC shots and the Nakamura character is a unique one to the WHC scene because I don't think there's been a foreign-speaking contender ever. Promos are always great, creative, and witty, which is what I love to see. I also love all the caps you have because they allow you to REALLY picture a promo and I know they're annoying to get sometimes, but it does really make a difference.
[Layla] **** I always like your descriptions and I like how you always manage to put some info/history about your character in them. Such as how you won feud of the year the last year and I like how you do that because not everyone can seeing as most people switch before they really develop their people, but you don't. You nail the bitch pretty well too. I also love that you got Dwolf to convert to the format of bold superstar name but non-bold text because it looks better imo. Anyways, I'll admit I've slacked on following this a bit (divas fault not you guys) though I have skimmed most of the promos so I knew the gist of this going into it. I liked the promo a lot and you're both good at your craft and going from nice to arguing to nice is great. Descriptions, again, are also very good and I feel they're an important part of the promo in creating the visual for the reader.
[Bobby Roode] *** I'm definitely not a fan of bolding what the character is saying and that's a style a lot of the new wave XWL members seem to have adopted, smh. Anyways, the actual content was nice and though there were some descriptions sprinkled into the beginning and end I'd of maybe like a couple in the middle. However, I did find that you portrayed the dialogue pretty well and hyped up your match later on with Drew pretty well. While scrolling the pages I'm pretty sure I saw a Drew/Roode promo also on this show so I'll definitely be looking forward to reading that within the next thirty minutes. Anyways, one last remark was that I liked how you brought up the steel chair drove into Roode's face because it's always nice to have a refresher in promos even if you did read the last promo because it's not always at the front of our minds.
[Drew McIntyre] *** Welp, my mistake. It was just a McIntyre promo. Anyways, the beginning with the Shhhh and the crowd was a nice touch and, again, I like things that stand out from typical straightforward promos because they're more entertaining and, in my opinion, the goal should be to write entertaining promos as is the goal to entertain in real life. I did like Drew's bits as he got things off his chest, but nothing in particular stood out to me. Like Dashing, I'd like if you formatted closer to how E/T does so (for one example), but I do actually like that you don't bold your actions and do bold your text so at least it varies that way. Anyways, not about to watch a twenty-two minute match so it's safe to say I'm fast-forwarding that... Ending was nice and well-written. Any possible fallout (since I don't think this feud is over?) will be nice to read in the future.
[Layla/Athena] **** Again, I like the actions from Layla because things such as walking slow and motioning for a crown paint a picture of your character very well and allows us to see what you're getting at which is beautiful. Liked the reactions done from the crowd and Layla's dialogue is always pretty on so there's that too. Anyways, I was pretty excited when I saw Athena's theme hit because Krzy always delivers so there's that too. Oh. I feel silly now having posted that when she didn't actually come out 3. Continuong on, I liked to see Athena did eventually come out because yay and the fight was nicely written, not too much to say about that, though one line of actions did catch my eye particularly soon-after... "It was truly the beginning of a rags to riches story before that rag was doused with gasoline and set ablaze." is the exact type of description that's beautiful to read so that was great. I loved the brief descriptions with the catchy little sayings sprinkled throughout the talking part because it's creative and yeah you can pretty much figure why because you're a much better promoer than I am... Anyways, with two very good promoers I'll be looking forward to this feud.
[James Storm] **1/2 Some interesting bits in here and the formatting was solid, could be a little better, but definitely solid. Grammar/spelling was a bit off-point, but again, nothing too bad. Definitely a step up from what I remember you doing back in the day so I'm going to have to say a pretty good promo by you and if you continue to improve then you'll be pretty good in no time. Also, I liked the use of pics and the fact that you had commentary as not everyone does include commentary.
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| | | Jimmy Mid Card
Posts : 213 Likes : 0 Join date : 2014-06-07 Age : 26
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 1:25 am | |
| Seems like you should give it a go. Some may not be able to take positive criticism, but still it seems like a good idea. Wouldn't just want you to leave. | |
| | | Alveuss Mid Card
Posts : 122 Likes : 1 Join date : 2013-07-16 Age : 27 Location : Glasgow, Scotland
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 1:29 am | |
| Thank you Danny for doing this. I know personally for me the thing I love the most about being in leagues such as this isn't doing the matches or winning fake titles but instead is writing promos. Taking a break from your own life and stepping into someone elses and doing whatever the fuck you want and when people give feedback it, at least to me, makes writing the promo worth it. I know there are many others who like the feedback too because it shows that someone actually took the time to read their work so again, thank you. | |
| | | T-Roll Upper Mid Card
Posts : 781 Likes : 14 Join date : 2013-03-04 Age : 26
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 1:46 am | |
| Ditto with what Alveuss said, even if you didn't include Madison's name with Layla's at the top of said paragraph. -.- | |
| | | Danny Boy Jobber
Posts : 80 Likes : 0 Join date : 2014-06-28 Location : United States
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 1:50 am | |
| - T-Roll wrote:
- Ditto with what Alveuss said, even if you didn't include Madison's name with Layla's at the top of said paragraph. -.-
Whoops. That's just because I put the name of the promo as Layla because that's who I saw first, then I didn't edit it because it was out of view on my tab by time I got to where Madison came in... probably. | |
| | | Nitro Mid Card
Posts : 301 Likes : 0 Join date : 2012-09-08 Age : 26
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 7:18 am | |
| While I think this is a cool idea and love the format.. It seems like it will be hard to do if your doing it for every promo. Hope to see you keep it up though.
Last edited by Nitro on Tue Aug 19, 2014 7:31 am; edited 2 times in total | |
| | | DashingDJUrie Mid Card
Posts : 393 Likes : -3 Join date : 2013-07-08 Age : 27 Location : The Hood
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 9:03 am | |
| Danny, you duh best 5ever n always | |
| | | TheKrzyOne Main Eventer
Posts : 2282 Likes : 107 Join date : 2011-04-05 Age : 13
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 9:21 am | |
| Athena did come out. Where does the promo end for you?
E: and what's with the sudden interest in the newsletter? Go sit down. | |
| | | Danny Boy Jobber
Posts : 80 Likes : 0 Join date : 2014-06-28 Location : United States
| Subject: Re: Reviews Thread Tue Aug 19, 2014 11:26 am | |
| - TheKrzyOne wrote:
- Athena did come out. Where does the promo end for you?
E: and what's with the sudden interest in the newsletter? Go sit down. Huh? I said later on that she did. When the theme played I thought it ended, but then it didn't and I continued then she did come out :S And I just saw someone mention it in another thread so I'd be willing to help with that | |
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